


Adventures of Edelgard

by tablo_the7th



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Modern AU, byleth is a brat, dorothea is p i n i n g, honestly, pet au??? idk, petra is trying her best
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-04-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:21:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23576821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tablo_the7th/pseuds/tablo_the7th
Summary: But that's just the thing. Things could have easily stayed the way they were, and Edelgard would have absolutely none of this ridiculous business on her mind. Now her sweet poor Lady Dorothea is desperately courting some oblivious foreigner, and hey, she's not xenophobic or anything, it's just that this Petra girl is... awfully bad at picking up thinly veiled hints.All because of one dumb excited blue shepherd. What freaking kind of shepherd had a blue coat anyways?orDorothea gets tackled by a random dog and crushes (hard) on its owner, through the eyes of 1 (one) Edelcat.
Relationships: Dorothea Arnault & Edelgard von Hresvelg, Dorothea Arnault/Petra Macneary, Edelgard von Hresvelg & My Unit | Byleth, Edelgard von Hresvelg/My Unit | Byleth
Comments: 20
Kudos: 188





	1. Edelgard Explains

Edelgard.

What a ridiculous name.

No, seriously, she doesn’t get it. Why can’t she be named something sweet and short and _easy_ or even something silly like Daisy or Molly or Mimi or, heck, even just Kitty? Why does it have to be some weird, ancient German name, when she’s pretty sure that her owner is not of any German descent. What more, Lady Dorothea always calls her “Edie” anyways, so what was even the point of naming her Edelgard?

But that’s beside the point. Edelgard could spend every living moment for the rest of her life bitching and moaning about her given name, but she figured that she was better off just accepting it as a part of her identity. Truth be told, she still loathes the name and even the more frequently used nickname, because no matter how hard she tries, whenever her sweet owner’s voice starts ringing from the hallway, Edelgard still cringes and reflexively contemplates just walking away.

On this particular morning, it was no different.

“Edie~” 

Dorothea Arnault, also known as Lady Dorothea, prettiest local cat owner in Edelgard’s humble opinion, who was probably high on some weed (or, more realistically and characteristically, ate too much sugar) when she came up with this tragedy of a name. Still, Edelgard was a forgiving cat, so she didn’t really hold that grudge. Especially not when she owes her life to the girl.

Much has changed since the first time she got picked up by the sweet brunette, and although Edelgard knew that the life of a stray cat wandering the streets of the busy capital and getting looked down by the very same animals of her kind was far behind her, the white ragdoll also recognized that if it hadn’t been for Dorothea who found her when she was almost starved to death, she wouldn’t be able to live the comfortable and fulfilling life she had today. Of course, it wasn’t exactly “go to pet spa on the weekends” and “get customized little cat toys” and “eat $12,000 caviar” or whatever the hell the filthy rich would do for their pets, but Edelgard was happy.

The two of them, human and cat, lived together peacefully in a house right outside of Enbarr, in the suburb area, where the view from the window was free of squirming crowds of people and the sunlight wasn’t obstructed by giant buildings. Edelgard spent most of her day lounging around the house or looking out from the open window in their kitchen into the little garden that Dorothea had taken up caring for as a little hobby. What could be better than enjoying the light afternoon breeze while gazing out at the flowers spotting their backyard with harmonizing colors? Not much, as far as Edelgard was aware. She was always proud of herself for being one of the few cats who can allow herself to indulge in such things and _actually_ appreciate the romanticism of it all.

(In the immediate area, that is.)

All in all, things were good. Aside from the name issue, Edelgard had little to complain about. She had a nice little bed, plenty of time for herself without having to worry about what the next day brings, Lady Dorothea, who was the best owner she could have wished for and well, to be honest? Life felt a little like a dream.

And, unfortunately, as all dreams do, this peaceful phase of her life had to come to an end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this is basically my take on an edelcat au lol. i've seen some absolutely wonderful fanarts of cat el and puppy byleth and i just. had to. it's doropetra centric, but the beagles will definitely make some cameos from time to time. basically came up with this idea when high on red bull at 3 am, so, like, i have a few things in mind, but mostly it's just lighthearted stuff. hope y'all enjoy this as much as i will :)


	2. Thoughts on Canines

It all started with something Linhardt said, because _of course_ Linhardt says something and it turns out to be life changing for all parties involved. Edelgard hasn't really had a lot of chances to interact with the man, but based on what Lady Dorothea told her, he was the only other person working the afternoon shift on weekends, he lived with what was "basically Troy from Community" (Edelgard doesn't understand that reference but she does eventually find out his roommate's name was Caspar. Caspar has a motorcycle he doesn't actually know how to ride and works at a gym in Enbarr) and that he was apparently tired all the time. He did seem like the kind of person who says life changing things randomly. After all, Linhardt was barely ever awake, and thus he exists in a perpetual state of dream-like slumber, free to explore the limits of the human mind. 

This was to say, Edelgard thinks Linhardt is high all the time and Dorothea entertains him by indulging in the ideas he proposes.

In this particular case, he suggested that Edelgard be taken out for a walk in the park.

Now, let's interrupt the story for a bit here to establish one thing: Despite being a cat, Edelgard doesn't actually hate dogs. Sure, she’s had a few uncomfortable encounters here and there in the back alleys of Enbarr, but the past was the past and she knew better than to let such things linger. Ever since moving in with Lady Dorothea, there had been little chance for her to ever see a dog aside from the occasional visits to the veterinarian, so she also didn’t really have anything to feel strongly about. She liked to keep her business to herself. After all, she was a cat, and there’s no real reason for her to get involved in the dog business.

Which is why, when Lady Dorothea relayed those very same words to her and tried to coax her into something that looked an awful lot like a _leash and harness_ , it was safe to say that Edelgard was not pleased.

After a few minutes of struggling and rioting (and maybe some light furniture scratching), they decided that Edelgard was a strong independent cat and that the pet-owner relationship was filled with healthy trust, so Dorothea walked and Edelgard tagged along. Problem solved, or so they thought.

After a few minutes of aimless strolling, Dorothea appeared to have recognized a few things: 1, she didn’t know where to go; 2, she didn’t even really want to go anywhere; and 3, oh my god, she was actually taking Linhardt’s advice seriously. Edelgard knew that cats don’t need to go on walks. Surely her owner must have been vaguely aware of this fact too. However, when they have already gone this far away from the house, even after all that protest, Lady Dorothea also didn’t want to turn back around. “Well, we’re already all the way out here,” she had shrugged.

Edelgard squinted and forced herself to trot along. Somehow, this feels even more unpleasant than her previous assumption of her being treated like a dog, but whatever makes Lady Dorothea happy. After all, a little walk outside couldn’t possibly hurt.

Edelgard was _wrong_.

So they went to a nearby park. Because the trip was entirely spontaneous, neither of them had any idea of what to do, nor did they have anything on hand. Ultimately, they just ended up lazing around on the grass and enjoying the peaceful atmosphere around them. Lady Dorothea did that, at least. All Edelgard felt was a strong urge to take a nap. Usually, around this time of the day, she would have been happily admiring the flowers in their garden that they have at _home_ , but they were outside and she had been trying to keep up with her owner’s pace for 15 minutes now, so Edelgard had no mind for such activities. That’s not to say that the scene at the park wasn’t nice - it was absolutely pleasant, and from the spot they picked under a tree, the sunlight doesn’t quite hit her. Some kids were chattering away from a distance, the grass tickled under her paws, Lady Dorothea was sitting right next to her, mindlessly stroking the fur on her back. Perfect ingredients for a little shut-eye session…

If only. It bothered Edelgard somewhat that everything is starting to go against her expectations, because as far as she was aware _nothing_ was going according to her assumptions that day. Maybe that was a sign. Maybe the universe is telling her that her world was going to flip upside down, and that literally everything was going to be different from that day onwards.

Because the next time Edlegard’s eyes fluttered open, her sensitive ears were greeted with a series of loud noises. “Thud”, something crashed into an obstacle. “Eek,” a high pitched shriek. “Dud,” something fell onto the ground. Everything happened so fast, so sudden, that before she was even able to register whatever was going on before her, there was a flurry of dark blue wiggling on the ground where Lady Dorothea had once been, and her ears were ringing like crazy, and quick, heavy footsteps were approaching. Oh no oh no what the heck what the he-

Came a string of incomprehensible words in an unfamiliar voice, two tanned arms lifting whatever blue mess was squirming on the ground, revealing a bewildered Dorothea underneath.

 _“Lady Dorothea!”_ Edelgard squealed, but she was sure it came out as a squeaky meow.

Blue abomination, now revealed to be an enormous wolf-looking thing, was now on the ground, grinning for whatever reason. Standing, or rather, crouching next to it was a girl who looked a little younger than Dorothea, one hand tugging on the leash attached to its collar and speaking in words Edelgard could not understand. Was she going crazy? Who in the world is this person, and why did that… that _thing_ assault her Lady Dorothea? Speaking of which, her owner must have fully recovered from the shock by now, but she was still laying wide-eyed on the ground. Oh Goddess, was she okay?

Edelgard nudged her arm lightly with one paw. 

Stranger girl seemed to notice after that, and offered a hand, which lingered in the air for an awkward 3 seconds while Dorothea seemed to still be in shock. _“You broke her,_ ” Edelgard directed a growl at the blue thing she now recognized as a giant dog, which answered her smugly. _“Oh, did I?”_

“Hey,” stranger girl winced a little and extended her hand a little further. “Are you alright?”

“Oh, um,” Dorothea blinked twice, as if waking up and returning to reality, before taking the offered hand and getting herself up. “Sorry about that.”

“No, no, I must be the person sorry,” the girl stammered, and Edelgard now realized that she wasn’t a fluent Fódlan speaker. “I did not pay much attention to Byleth, and she was just running off.”

“Byleth?” Dorothea tilted her head, one hand still fixing the brown locks. 

“Ah, yes, that is my... um... house animal?” She paused for a moment, before quickly bowing her head. “I am sorry, I have not acquired full knowledge of this language yet. My name is Petra.”

This is bad, Edelgard thought to herself. She doesn’t quite understand how or why, but something is tugging at the corner of her mind and she just knew that this was not going to result in something favorable for her, especially when Dorothea had a look that Edelgard had only seen on her face twice before. That look meant less Edie time, fewer lazy weekend nights, and extremely uncomfortable presence of another stranger around her Lady Dorothea. She had seen this play out times and times before - Edelgard was well aware of her owner’s beauty and the many people going after her. Mildly inconvenient at best and absolutely despicable at worst. So no, Edelgard doesn’t approve. 

But what does it matter when Dorothea was already happily chatting up this Petra girl, her voice already assuming a melodic tone and her phone already drawn out from her pocket? There was little Edelgard could do to intervene, like it or not. The white ragdoll scowled and averted her eyes from this disaster-to-be scene playing out in front of her.

Standing by Petra and snuggling into the side of the girl’s legs was the newly dubbed Byleth, silently watching, looking a little too proud of herself for Edelgard to hold onto any little hope she had left. So it wasn’t an arbitrary attack. Of course it wasn't. Judging from the well groomed coat of fur and the proud, oddly commanding stance she was taking, the cat had to assume that this was not a mere accident at all, and more something of a motive-driven plan, which made her a little wary. She can somewhat guess that this was one of the rich-pet types that was smug, prideful and had little regards for any others. The real question was, what was Byleth getting out of tackling Dorothea? Surely this was not some freaky supernatural plot, right?

Edelgard might have to reconsider her opinion of dogs. 


	3. Friends

Okay, so scratch that whole supernatural business. Petra - and Byleth, by association - seemed fine. Normal. As in, Edelgard doesn’t think the girl is a Faerghus spy or anything of the likes. If anything, she finds that Petra is quite pleasant, just ordinary enough to satisfy all of her basic requirements, but not bland to the point of being unremarkable. The girl apparently hails from Brigid, a small country within the Adrestian Commonwealth, and was enrolled at the Enbarr School of Business, which was an area of study that Edelgard must admit she holds a very high amount of respect for. She spends most of her week in the city, and only comes to the suburbs on some weekends - a redeeming quality in Edelgard’s opinion, since her issues with Lady Dorothea spending less time around would be somewhat resolved. 

Her other issues, however, do remain. Edelgard doesn’t understand human affections, she truly doesn’t. It felt to her like way too much effort for what was basically just another thing to worry about in life, another burden to bear, another presence to take up space in the already tiny frame of time one has. Maybe Lady Dorothea and other humans can’t quite understand this, seeing as their average lifespan was easily five times that of her own. Even so - mortality talk aside - Edelgard just doesn’t see the point. There are so many other things she’d rather be doing with her time, like… like binging home decor shows when Lady Dorothea forgets to turn the television off, or enjoying a particularly good plate of fresh fish, or just taking a nap! At least that gets her well-rested and happy. Literally anything is better than being in some thrilling romance. What a waste of time and energy.

This was not to say she resented the idea of Lady Dorothea being infatuated, nor does it mean she wished ill upon this whole affair. Edelgard knew better than to expect her hopeless romantic of an owner to share her views on affection and “love”. It’s not like the cat can just wake up from a nap one day and speak perfect Fodlan anyways, so convincing Dorothea is out of the question. As the humans do say, whatever floats her boat. That said, Edelgard found herself conveniently tuning out a lot these days, as Dorothea’s choice of conversation topics shifted from “shit Linhardt says” and “despicable customers” to tanned skin and cute little tattoos and, no, she’s not making this up, “dreamy, fascinating mauve eyes” (which is an incredibly confusing color, by the way, but enough about Edelgard and her sophisticated opinions as a cat). She’s been through all of this before, all the admiring and daydreaming and nasty, disgusting  _ feelings _ . Edelgard doesn’t care for it much when Petra walks through their doorstep merely a week and five days (yes, she counted) after their first encounter, nor does she let it linger on her mind for too long that Dorothea was leaving her with Miss Bernadetta one weekend morning with a smile so bright it could rival the sun and a melody already quietly escaping her lips. Petra, as in turns out, wasn’t a problem at all. Petra was nice and respectful, and she bought Edelgard some purple ribbons to play with once, so Edelgard was fine with letting the girl pet her every once in a while.

Meanwhile, Byleth. Byleth was the issue.

First of all, Edelgard’s opinion on dogs still hasn’t changed. Dogs are fine. Dogs can mind their business and she will stick to hers. It’s just that Byleth doesn’t want to oblige by this unspoken agreement, which frustrates Edelgard to no end, because it is so obvious that the shepherd can just… not be involved. Sure, Petra can come over, but Byleth doesn’t always have to tag along. Edelgard realizes that this is more of a Petra decision, but still. If there was a way for her to communicate to the girl that she does not want Byleth around, she would not hesitate for even a heartbeat. Instead, as Petra’s weekend visits increase in frequency, so too does Byleth invade more and more of the sacred space Edelgard knew as home. 

Dark blue fur was  _ everywhere _ . By the doorstep, under the dining table, on the living room carpet, in the hallways, and  _ all over Lady Dorothea’s jeans _ . The audacity! A spot that Edelgard so rightfully earned and was so well acquainted to, and this humongous wolf-looking thing took it to herself to curl up on Dorothea’s lap only on her  _ fourth  _ time visiting? What does that make Edelgard? An unnecessarily cautious and affection deprived cat? Why does Byleth make it all seem so easy and casual, just walking into a home and making herself comfortable like it’s her own? Maybe this was it, this was what Byleth wanted all along. 

Edelgard realizes that this might be a bit of an overreaction - assuming that Byleth did all this and planned everything perfectly just so she can flop her tail around by Lady Dorothea’s side, but let’s be honest here : what would be more likely, Byleth having so much natural charm, or Byleth calculating carefully to use Petra as a leeway to taking Lady Dorothea’s lap all to herself? That devil of a dog… always so aloof, so indifferent, so unnatural. Aren’t dogs supposed to be all happy, energetic and excited or something? Edelgard would gladly bet her entire stash of cat food that Byleth was, in fact, a demon sent from hell to torture her, and her personally. 

_ “I hope you’re happy now.”  _ Edelgard had scowled on one rainy day when Dorothea thought it would be nice to invite Petra in. Byleth, of course, was now confident enough to invite herself onto the living room carpet and promptly sat down by the couch. If either of their owners were around, obviously she wouldn’t have even hesitated just a second to crawl up on that very same couch and wiggle her way into someone’s lap, where Edelgard could have, would have been. 

_ “Of course,”  _ Byleth answered disinterestedly, absolutely no hints of remorse or guilt or anything at all, really.  _ “I’m barely able to contain my excitement.” _

_ “Why are you the way that you are?”  _

Byleth snickered and it sounded like labored wheezing, so much that it got Petra hurrying out of the kitchen and a light “You guys okay out there?” from Dorothea. Although, judging from the pink hues on the younger girl’s cheeks, it would probably be safe to assume that Petra wasn’t doing quite “okay” in there either. 

After a couple moments of petting and deliberately slow tail wagging, Petra had to attend to her other company. Edelgard huffed and hopped onto the couch in an effort to demonstrate her superior power and authority over the dog. Byleth merely flopped her tail over lazily again. Dorothea’s happy teasing tone ringed from within the kitchen again, something about handling delicate things and oh whatever stuppid thing people say to flirt. There’s a sense of hope in it, a kind of trust and joy, one that Edelgard can’t quite put her paws on yet, and it suddenly hit her that this might be what her life will look like now. That what little Edie time that remained free from casual lunch dates and nights spent smiling at silly texts would now be compromised with this, with attempts at baking despite numerous previous failures and unbelievably obvious displays of attraction, with Petra and cute language mishaps and the crazy stories of a girl attending college in a foreign country and, Goddess forbid, with Byleth.

How could something like this have happened to her? To the beautiful, peaceful life that she had only just gotten used to? Edelgard had to believe, she must believe, that this didn’t come jumping out of nowhere. How could an encounter so simple in nature, so irrelevant in the grand scheme of things, change everything she knows? It’s so small, so preventable, so awfully  _ insignificant _ , it’s just baffling to her. 

But that's just the thing. Things could have easily stayed the way they were, and Edelgard would have absolutely none of this ridiculous business on her mind. Now her sweet poor Lady Dorothea is desperately courting some oblivious foreigner, and hey, she's not xenophobic or anything, it's just that this Petra girl is... awfully bad at picking up thinly veiled hints.

All because of one dumb excited blue shepherd. What freaking kind of shepherd had a blue coat anyways? And now Edelgard suspects, no, she knows for a fact, that Byleth was not excited at all. Byleth feels little to nothing, except maybe satisfaction that she had successfully dismantled a perfectly innocent cat’s life. And Byleth needs to go.

There must be a way to accelerate this, somehow. Get past all the weird awkwardness and move on to the fallout. Edelgard can navigate the broken pieces, she’s sure of it. She’s seen it before and dealt with it before and every single other time, Dorothea had gotten out in one piece. Maybe if she assaulted Byleth in revenge it would cause a rift between their owners?

_ “You seem awfully concerned.”  _ Speak of the devil herself.

_ “No, really, why are you the way that you are?” _

_ “What do you care?” _

_ “Why did you tackle Lady Dorothea?” _

_ “Why,”  _ Bylet scoffed, this time making sure to keep it to herself. The shepherd got up from the floor, and made her way over to where Edelgard was on the couch.  _ “Is that such a bad thing to do? I’m just an overgrown puppy” _

_ “You’re meddling.”  _

It was not until Edelgard, too, got up, that she realized even with the couch’s boost, she was only a hair taller than the dog. And as they come face to face (or the closest that two pets can get to being face to face), she realized exactly what it was that made Byleth so unsettling to her, what makes her presence so offsetting, so intimidating.

_ “I tackled her because I want Petra to be happy. Goddess knows she needs a little push in the right direction,”  _ Byleth nodded her head in the kitchen’s direction.  _ “But you, Edie. What do you want, really?” _

“Oh, look! The pets are becoming friends!” Petra approaches them excitedly, with the topic of their conversation hot on her tail. “I must admit, I was not thinking Byleth is a friendly dog.”

“Odd,” Dorothea sets two plates with slices of cake on the coffee table. “I didn’t think Edie was the buddy-buddy type herself.”

Edelgard comes to a conclusion that day, but it’s more of an observation. A recognition, if you will. Petra wasn’t going anywhere any time soon, and it’s evident that neither will Byleth. But it wasn’t something to bitch and moan about, not something to add to her ever growing list of topics for complaints besides her given name. It was something to look after, to carefully guard, because it makes Dorothea  _ happy _ . 

For the first time ever since she first started entertaining the ideas of love and a relationship between her owner and the unfortunate owner of this dog that now sits 4 feet away from her, Edelgard realized she was afraid. Not afraid of losing what she has now, but afraid of losing this Dorothea, the one that is filled to the brim with joy and glowing with colors more vibrant than the cat had ever seen her. It’s so easy to bring all of this about. Equally as easy to lose it, too. Edelgard had seen that before, seen the breakups and nights spent curled up in a blanket eating ice cream, the days and weeks and months of  _ moping _ . Nothing is the same after the fallout.

This is temporary, she knows. Byleth knows, she thinks as she looks over to her left, or at least now she does. Edelgard had thought Byleth was calculating before, meddling, scheming, smug and confident, but that was clearly not the case. Byleth was something else entirely, almost. Something like her.

_ “I assume you’ve worked it out for yourself then?”  _ The same low grumble comes from her side again, this time quiet and nothing like the interrogation she had just received moments ago. 

_ “Don’t let this get to your head. It’s already big enough as it is.”  _ Edelgard scurries over to where Dorothea had set out the cat food for her. _ “I will sit by and watch this go on. For now.” _

_ “Well,”  _ Byleth responda indifferently, much like she does with anything else.  _ “Aren’t you just the cutest.” _

“Don’t you think it’s cute, Petra dear? Our little friends are making friends among themselves.” 

“Oh, yes.” Petra smiles brightly and brings the mug of hot chocolate up to her lips. “Very lovely, I think.”

Well. Now Edelgard needs to learn to make friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and we’re back! i got sucked into some webtoons and completely neglected everything going on around me for the past few days, but now we have some more of edelcat’s opinions! the story of doropetra is moving a little fast, but a few more snippets of them is on the way, still, so no worries, y’all will still get your fix of edelcat hot takes :)


	4. Wing...cat?

Edelgard thinks about what life would be like if she were human every once in a while.

Mostly just the little things. Like being able to lounge around all day, enjoy all kinds of tasty sweets without her stomach going upset  _ way  _ too early, or being able to see things without having to nearly break her neck every time. But sometimes it’s the really, really simple things.

Like being able to speak human language, for example. Because for all that Edelgard is grateful she can communicate freely with any other animals, sometimes she really wishes she could talk to the humans as well. Even if it was just for 1 sentence, and even if it will freak people out infinitely and even if she gets locked in a secret alien lab somewhere underground. Goddess, anything, anything to get away from th-

“She’s just so… wonderful, Edie,” followed by a dreamy sigh. 

Now, see, if this were Dorothea, Edelgard would have easily tuned her out. It’s the months and years of practice. Some things you just get used to, like the weird daydreams and the aimless ramblings. After a while, everything just sort itself out and the moment the cat recognizes the signs is the same moment she starts applying her finely developed skills. 

But this is certainly unexpected, getting hugged to Petra’s chest and having to listen to this one muse about her owner for a change. It started out innocent of course, as all catastrophes do. Lady Dorothea had to set out for some business in Enbarr today, something about visiting an orphanage and an old lady by the name of Manuela. And since there was someone who lived in Enbarr (how convenient) who Dorothea had grown… close to in recent days (how absolutely convenient), the answer was clear. Edelgard was to spend the day at Petra’s apartment instead of the regular Bernadetta arrangement, and her Lady was to pick her up sometime in the afternoon.

Whatever, Edelgard had thought when she first trotted into the living room and found Byleth wiggling in her sleep on the floor. Days spent at Bernadetta’s place were usually spent napping and playing with yarn balls the girl had left lying around where she was knitting. Which, well, okay, wasn’t much, but at least Bernadetta never did anything involving other people or… anything besides whatever little project she was working on at the time, really. She can’t possibly expect Petra to do anything too drastic or crazy exciting, seeing as the girl was still a student after all, and especially considering her pet dog is basically some weird disinterested thing that was still sleeping when the day was well into its 10th hour.

Oh, if only she knew. 

It’s certainly one thing to watch Dorothea pine hopelessly after this girl. It’s another thing to realize that this same girl was probably equally, if not more interested in her owner. That being said, Edelgard also understands why this whole endeavour isn’t making any progress. And it was something so simple, so easy, that Edelgard knew if she could only tell Petra this one thing, everything else would fall into place. As previously stated, the cat doesn’t care much for human affection, so it really shouldn’t bother her this much. But, oh Goddess help her, this is so, so, so annoying.

“I do not know what to do, little Edie…” Petra sighed again, this time saddened and deflated.

_ “I know what to do.”  _ She grumbled.  _ “You say the exact same things you told me, but to her.” _

_ “Oh trust me if I could convey that to this kid I would have already.”  _ Byleth chirped up from the small armchair where she had been laying for the past couple of minutes. 

“Ah, look at you guys. I wish I am able to be understanding you. Maybe you would have good advice for me, Edie.”

Expand your vocabulary, for one. Edelgard has a feeling, or rather she knows for a fact that nearly 80% of the language Dorothea uses to communicate her attraction flew over the foreign girl’s head. It was a good thing the attraction is mutual, really, because otherwise the cat had feared that the girl would be somewhat creeped off by the figurative speech and all the codes and many, many open invitations. Now, Edelgard understands that Petra was trying her best, and that navigating her way through life in the busy capital of another country with completely different language and culture was difficult, but still. Edelgard has a limit and that limit has been stepped over ever since Petra said “beautiful” for the seventh time in her “I love Dorothea but I can’t say it to her because I am afraid she doesn’t like me that way” speech.

Astounding, how much of a difference communication can make. Ever since that time Edelgard openly told Byleth that she still wasn’t sure whether she liked her or not, the dog had been surprisingly pleasant. Less smug and more compliant. But enough about Byleth and her growing to be a likeable acquaintance. The problem, this time, is very obviously Petra. 

If only there was a way for Edelgard to signal to Petra that she should make that move because her Lady Dorothea never will. Edelgard saw in a movie once where some animals wrote things on a notepad for their owner, but 1. That message was entirely too vulgar to recite, 2. Even though Edelgard can read human language perfectly well, she was not confident in her ability to maneuver a pen and 3. That is so creepy. Imagine coming home to a note written in nearly illegible handwriting when the only other occupant of the house was a cat that, as far as you were concerned, was not working for the local department of wingpersons. Yeah. Imagine.

Other options? She can try doing what Byleth did, but the problem with her being only a slightly-average sized cat aside, Edelgard doubts that at this point of their relationship either Petra or Dorothea would appreciate getting tackled by her. Unless of course she pushes them into some sort of awkward semi-kissing-on-the-floor kind of pose that she saw so many times in those dramas that Dorothea binged last summer…

_ “Byleth, are you still interested in tackling p-” _

Petra smiled fondly, tugged on the purple ribbon that Dorothea had tied into a small bow around Edelgard’s neck, and resumed her work on the laptop. Byleth flicked one ear up lazily and hopped off of the couch to walk over into the kitchen, or whatever the equivalent of a kitchen was in this tiny apartment. The cat attempted to wiggle out of Petra’s hold, but it was no use - as much as Edelgard hated to admit it, her strength was simply no match for adult humans. But if Byleth’s response was any indication of her opinion on this tackling plan, she would have to assume that operation Knock Them Into Each Other was a no-go. 

Damn this useless cat body. There has to be a way. There has to be some way to accelerate this, some kind of catalyst, something that will break through this weird mutual pining phase. Dorothea was supposed to return at 2 PM. It was 1:15 PM at the moment. Edelgard suddenly missed her stray cat days. She used to run into this weird racoon called Hubert who she is pretty sure was either present everywhere or was just stalking her. He also smells like rust all the time and she saw him pushing a trash can over this other one-eyed cat who she complained about once. But that’s beside the point. It’s just that Hubert is a very good schemer. She could use his talent for devising mildly sinister but efficient plans right now. 

_ “Byleth!”  _ She growled loudly and wiggled with more force. Petra seemed to get the message this time, raising an eyebrow in concern and letting her free without much protest, something that Edelgard appreciated greatly. Lady Dorothea was not even close to being half this relenting. 

_ “No.”  _ The shepherd answered as soon as she landed her paws on the kitchen floor. Byleth was currently sitting by the small table, practically ripping on this piece of plastic that Edelgard sincerely hoped was a chew toy. 

_ “You don’t even know what I was going to ask you.” _

_ “You look weird when you scheme,”  _ Byleth let go of the toy and kicked it lightly with one of her paws.  _ “I mean, it’s cute, but no.” _

_ “You seem to be trying your hardest to infuriate me.”  _ Edelgard inched closer, as if evaluating the dog in front of her.  _ “And please do speak up if you have a plan because I am sick and ti-” _

A series of knocks came on the door, one that was too rhythmic and accompanied by a voice that could not be mistaken for anyone else but her lovely Lady Dorothea. Almost immediately, Byleth got p and jogged towards the door, all while calling out Petra’s name excitedly. This makes no sense. Edelgard didn’t think Byleth capable of feeling excitement at all, and the audacity of that dog, to ignore her complaints like that! This can only mean one thing - Byleth had been plotting again. Which means she turned down Edelgard’s plan because she had a plan of her own.

Somehow this knowledge made her more concerned than pleased. For all that Edelgard knew, Byleth, who started this whole thing with her assault on Dorothea, might come up with something that puts her Lady in even more potential harm. It also offended her slightly that this dog doesn’t even want to consider what she had in mind before deciding on an action plan. Also, Byleth was getting into dangerously close range of Dorothea now, and unless Edelgard wishes to watch her world flip upside down again just like the last time her owner got knocked over, she had to put a stop to this, whatever this is.

_ “Byleth!”  _ Edelgard started running, and it was the fastest she had moved for a  _ very  _ long time, so her traction was… a little poor, which was something she only realized when she was about to crash into a wall of blue fur. Somewhere, behind her, she can hear Petra’s surprised yelp, and the greeting that was on the tip of Lady Dorothea’s tongue. One of Byleth’s ears perked up from where she was sitting before the open door, and Edelgard prayed maybe for the first time ever in her 16 months of life. Oh Goddess, Goddess, please let her come out of this in one piece. 

Edelgard knocked into Byleth’s back and it sent the cat straight to the floor.

“Oh my gOD EDIE!” Dorothea all but screamed and Petra practically flew over from the couch. Before Edelgard was able to regain her balance, she was already swiftly picked up into her Lady’s arms. Looking, she caught Byleth’s gaze, who cocked her head to the side curiously. Edelgard scowled. Byleth stuck out her tongue and did something with her face that vaguely resembled a stupid grin. Petra reached out one hand to scratch between her ears, and Dorothea giggled happily. If Edelgard wasn’t so engaged with scowling at Byleth, she would have purred. 

“I hope she wasn’t too much of a bother. Edie has really been acting strange these days.”

“Oh, she has been lovely all day. I think little Edie was just wanting to play with Byleth!” Petra supplied happily. If only the girl knew…

Edelgard rolled her eyes as Dorothea set a flirtatious hand on Petra’s arm. If she was going to ogle someone else’s biceps then she could at least let her pet down first. She instead settled on staring at Byleth’s blank face while waiting for this whole flirting deal to be over. In the background was the muffle sound of two oblivious humans who needed yet another little push. Just a little push…

_ “You really do look cute when you scheme.”  _ Byleth offered as Petra stumbled over her words when Dorothea proposed something along the lines of a tea date. 

_ “Must you do that all the time?” _

_ “Well, you look cute all the ti-.” _

“Oh, it seems that Edie is saying her goodbye to Byleth over here,” Dorothea chuckled. “So, what do you say, Petra? Next Saturday at my place?”

A flustered Petra nodded furiously and Dorothea winked at her before shifting Edelgard back into both of her arms and bidding goodbye in the most corny of the corny flirty lines, “It’s a date, then.”

“Take care, Dorothea! I will be seeing you next week!”

Edelgard had no other specific thoughts for the rest of their way home. It had been a mostly quiet ride, which was a bit unorthodox for Lady Dorothea, considering how much she liked to gush about Petra just as soon as the other girl left, really, but it must have been a pretty long day for Dorothea after all, spending her whole time in Enbarr at the orphanage and then having to handle the relentless being that was Manuela Casagranda. She can’t blame her owner for being tired out, so instead Edelgard laid nicely in her carrier and listened to the music playing softly from the car radio. 

As much as she cared for her reputation as a sophisticated cat, Edelgard cannot truthfully admit to being well-versed on the subject of music. No, that was always more of a Lady Dorothea area. The cat has long given up count on the lazy Sunday mornings out in the garden, singing along to some song that was being blasted from her phone. It always hurt Edelgard’s sensitive ears somewhat, so she usually opted to sit back on the threshold and watch as her Lady tend to the flowers and sang. The music changes every time, sometimes cheesy love songs, sometimes a heart-wrenching ballad, sometimes a majestic tune that gets one’s blood pumping. The only thing that was consistent was how much heart Dorothea puts into her singing. It gets Edelgard thinking sometimes, if this was only temporary. If her Lady Dorothea was actually meant to be a shining star, one who graces the stage with her presence and one who was beloved by all. Of course, she was no critic, and sure, she’s biased, but Edelgard honestly believed that Dorothea was most like herself when she was immersed in the music. Like that was where she always belonged.

This notion makes it all that scary for Edelgard when she realizes that Dorothea hasn’t made a single sound on their entire trip back to home. No singing, no humming, nothing. It’s like there was some kind of tension in the air, and the way the girl gripped onto the driving wheel so hard that her knuckles were turning white concerned her even more. Something was on Dorothea’s mind, something that overshadows even music, and Edelgard sat in anticipation of the reveal.

The silence was only broken when the car came to a halt and Lady Dorothea turned to open the carrier’s door to let her cat out.

“Oh, for the love of all that is good in this world,” she whispered, hugging the white ragdoll into her chest and staring wistfully into the skyline. “I talked to Manuela about everything... I think I’m going to do it, Edie. I’m really going to ask Petra to be my girlfriend.”

Whatever Edelgard did to make this happen, she was sure glad she did it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's happening... ish :) i'd like to thank my city's lift of the quarantine orders for making this chapter happen. i'm such a bernadetta type person most of the time that it feels weird saying i'm glad to be outside, but look where we are now. how the turns have tabled.
> 
> stay safe and eat well y'all!


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